Thursday, April 24, 2008

New and Improved on the Old and Traditional

I wish someone would just tell me I have been under a rock for the past 20 years. I realized that lately I'm hearing phrases and descriptive terms on products and services that are presented as words that were just "invented". I used to love a meal and just enjoy it for the taste and the fact that it had simple layman descriptions like "super sized" or "full rack". But now, I can't order anything on the menu unless it has "Chipotle" spices or "Angus" beef in it, on it or surrounded by it. Finding definitions for old food is not my idea of creating interest. The same ketchup I have had since I was three now has "Lycopene", my traditional orange juice now has "antioxidants" and even my water has "electrolytes" to inject vapor distilled (calcium chloride, magnesium chloride and potassium bicarbonate) into my what I thought was just a way to quench my thirst. When I arise from my rock in 20 more years, I know that my bologna won't have a first name and my hot dogs won't be within a Ballpark's throw of containing a tasty blend of my favorite meats (pork, beef, chicken, or turkey), meat fat, a cereal filler which could be either bread crumbs, flour, or oatmeal, a little bit of egg white, and a mouth-watering array of herbs and seasonings including garlic, pepper, ground mustard, nutmeg, salt, and onion. Sorry, I just passed a Texas Wiener franchise in the car and got carried away.

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